Today I Face The World

Today I woke up wanting to fly all over the plains, the city, the mountains, the ocean, and the bay—but I am no bird.

Today I woke up feeling free—but in fact incarcerated by the barriers of thoughts that cover both sides of my eyes—you know—just like the horses in the countryside whose masters want to keep them focus in what is ahead and not on what's on the side of the road.

Today I woke up with a great feeling of accomplishment—not having accomplished anything yet.

Today I woke up feeling loved—even though my heart has not met her and my bedside is still alone, cold…like the lonely night under the lover’s moon.

Today I woke up wanting to smile—but the warm, salty tears melted on my cheeks as they came from a lonely heart.

Today I woke up recognizing that I am no bird; understanding that freedom might never be achieved; and that accomplishing the goals is simply a distant goal; failing to understand why love still does not exist; wanting to smile even when the tears of the heart invade my heart; just recognizing that this one morning, to the rhythm of the melody of winter birds, with the smell of coffee in the air, and dense clouds that disappear as the sun makes its entrance, I have to still put my mask on and face the world.

I now walk through the day—waiting—waiting for the day when the mask will come off—just so I can face the world MY WAY; flying, thinking freely, accomplishing the goals, loving, and smiling.

...I am still asleep.